Wiser Devotions

Recently a dear friend kindly complimented a short article I wrote for Christ and Pop Culture asking whether we need a daily quiet time. She asked if I would flesh out my thoughts on ways to keep devotions fresh and beneficial. Here is the letter I wrote in reply.


The simple, central question we need to have about devotional time is this; What is devotional time for? The answer I keep coming back to, time and time again, is intimacy. Devotional time with God is for developing intimacy with him, for knowing him better, and for more closely aligning our hearts and our desires with his. Just like any relationship, the connection is built through time together, through experiences together, and through vulnerability with each other. Of course there are a whole host of reasons that intimacy with God has a different flavor and, in my experience, is more difficult. But the serious Christian mind can’t get around the absolute necessity of intimacy with God. Devotional time is all about helping us get that. And as such, the way we build our devotional time needs to be directed at achieving it.

Joshua Harris gave an excellent talk called Principle and Practice (you can find it online), in which he challenged his church with their tendency to wrongly lift up a PRACTICE (say, homeschooling your kids) as if it were biblical, when in fact it is not, rather than focusing on honoring the PRINCIPLE (such as loving your kids and overseeing their education and training). I think this is what happens with devotions, especially in conservative churches. As you say, it becomes a checklist- the practice of a certain type of quiet time becomes a matter of right and wrong, when in fact nothing in the Bible says this. And yet we see many things that devotions are trying to accomplish that ARE in Scripture; principles like the importance of knowing God’s word, closeness with God in prayer, and the pursuit of godly wisdom.

So whatever you do in devotions, whether my ideas are helpful or not, the MOST important thing is to design it in ways that help YOU grow in intimacy with God. If something is preventing that, change it! If some new idea seems to work especially well, incorporate it! My suggestions from here on out all have that goal in mind.

The Value of Structure

I don’t have to tell you that structure has value. I think it’s probably fair to say that you’re a more structured person than me as a general rule! But I think when it comes to devotions, we have the wrong idea about structure. For some reason we think that a)we have to follow certain structures even if they don’t work, and b) structure means doing something the same way every single time. My question to both those things is; why? If I was trying to grow in intimacy with my friend Bob by working out with him (the exact same way every time!), but it was resulting in boredom and zero healthy conversations (and weird muscle disparities), why would I keep doing it that way?

And yet the need for intimacy remains. So one big switch in my thinking was this: the best kind of devotional structure is structure in GOALS. That means that it is a good idea to set a devotional goal for myself, but a poor idea to assume I HAVE to do it a certain way every time. Instead, I want to focus on getting to that goal any way I can. And because we’re businesspeople, let’s say that our goals should be SMART (specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and timely).

Example: The month of August is beginning, and I’m noticing that I have an especially ugly attitude toward people. Humanity has lost any redeeming or redeemable value in my mind, and I’m constantly angry at everyone. I want to fix this. I decide that in this case intimacy means seeing humanity the way God sees humanity. So then, my goal for August is, “To see improvement in my love for others by the end of the month, as measured by my day to day attitude toward people at work and at church.” The first thing I want to do is to pray about that; asking God to help me accomplish that goal, to open his wisdom in this area to me, etc.

Now, there are a lot of ways I can get there. I can begin by doing a study of Genesis… reading through it, reading commentaries on the parts that pertain to my goal, etc. I can also read passages from other parts of the Bible that apply. I can read a book on the topic. I can read articles (of which there are MILLIONS for free online). I can do some google searches to find art or movies that might help me think about this area more. I can chat with friends or mentors about my ideas or questions. Each day, I can find a new way of advancing my understanding of how God sees humanity and work to mirror that in my own life. And most importantly, I can spend time praying about each of these things… asking that God would help me take them to heart, that he would give me a sense of how he thinks about them, etc. This approach is powerful because, as science tells us, our brains are stimulated by newness and change. By doing things this way, we are consistent in pursuing a devotional goal, but we allow ourselves to use simple tricks of human psychology to help keep us engaged and excited by that pursuit.

So by the end of the month, I have vigorously addressed a particular area. The structure of the goal helped me and gave me direction and a plan, without limiting me by becoming rote or liturgy. It also kept me open to new or unexpected insights… because my reading and experience is all over the place, I am prepared to be taught things I didn’t expect. And because I’m still taking in a lot of information, I am learning more than just my topic; I am building my theological framework for how I think about all of the Christian life. And as I take all that in, God and I have something specific to talk about. J I think those are the values of structure.

Oh, and one quick side note. A constant question in my mind this week has been this; “how does this apply to our brothers and sisters who are illiterate or don’t have access to a Bible?” It bothers me that so many Christians say something is sin (i.e. failing to have a daily quiet time of reading Scripture) when there are people in the world who do not have that option. THAT is a huge indicator that someone is mixing up Principle with Practice. So a big thing I like about the structured goals approach is that it gives freedom to the illiterate or Bible-less brother who can find alternative ways of developing his intimacy with God and still be faithful.

The Value of Flexibility

One difficulty with scheduled devotions in general, and even the structured approach I’ve advocated above, is that there are certain moments when we experience extremes; specifically, either extreme inspiration in a particular area or extreme challenge. These extremes command a response from us, but we can easily feel a challenge if we assume that our devotional schedule cannot change and yet our interest lies elsewhere.

That is why I would advocate openness to flexibility. Essentially, this means allowing yourself tangents from your structured devotions. One allowable tangent is time-sensitive, God-oriented projects. Perhaps you are asked to teach a Sunday School class on the book of Acts, but you are in the midst of studying the Old Testament prophets. It is OK to set aside the prophets for a time and to focus your devotional time on your lesson! I’m always shocked by how many people think this is an evil thing. What could be bad about that one week delay while you do something else that is just as legitimate in developing your relationship with God?

Another allowable tangent, it seems to me, is response to extreme emotions and circumstances. Perhaps I’m having a good month and I decide to delve into the theological nuances of soteriology. But a week into it, my friend tells me his wife had an affair and they are getting a divorce. Because intimacy with God (rather than following a schedule) is our goal, this is a good opportunity to use devotional time to cry out in anguish, to work through sorrow, and to know God’s will for times of trial more intimately. One specific example of this for me was September 11, 2001. We were in college, and that experience drove me (and, I assume, millions of other people) to more closely consider sorrow and why God allows such spectacular pain. There is no reason that I needed to spend half an hour every day in the week after that event completing my assigned readings of Leviticus.

A final helpful tangent is moments of inspiration. Sometimes some little thing in a book, or a movie, or something someone says in a good conversation will set your mind ablaze with possibilities, and you’ll be inspired to know much more about God in that area. It’s perfectly ok to lay aside your scheduled plan for a while so that you can pursue intimacy in response to inspiration, and then come back to your structured purpose later.

A key point here is that this has to do with MINDSET… recognizing that certain things are ok, and knowing WHY they are ok, so that you are freed to pursue them without guilt.

The Value of Feedback

We all know consistency is difficult. I think it is both ok and even important to find pragmatic ways to help ourselves grow in consistency. One of the best ways of doing this is getting feedback. I think it is helpful to get feedback and insight, even constructive criticism, from a friend on things like what they think about the devotional goals we’ve chosen, how we’re pursuing them, and how successful we are in accomplishing them. This is true because it keeps us accountable, but also because they help us see things we may have missed. Like a good editor for an article you are writing, a wise Christian friend can help streamline your devotional approach and can keep an eye on whether you are doing it. This tends to motivate us, and it also helps us with the M (measurable) part of our SMART goal. After all, who can tell you better about whether you seem to be progressing than a friend who sees your life?

I think too many of us grew up with this idea that there HAS to be a purely personal, separate-from-everything aspect to your relationship with God. Ok, I can agree with that to a certain extent. But who says we can’t use community to help strengthen us in that pursuit? And in what way is our time with God degraded if someone else knows what we’re doing in it? For that reason, I think being very open with someone about our devotions… and even about our devotional STRATEGY beforehand… is a good way to help keep us on task and inspired. I also think it’s a really good idea that this person KNOW they fill this role. In other words, it gives them a way to help you build and maintain your spiritual life without committing huge amounts of time or effort. You can simply write down your devotional goal for a time period, check in with them periodically to let them know how it’s going and what you’re learning, and then ask them whether they are seeing fruit in that area of your life. This also allows you to be quicker to challenge each other, because instead of arguing about “enough” devotional time or “filling a checklist,” you can focus on questioning each other’s growth according to goals that the other person committed themselves to. And of course you can be in prayer for each other, asking God to speak to that person in a particular area and to reveal himself in ways that help them grow.

One final note here is that we tend to grow more from experiences we remember, and we remember things better when we articulate them to someone else. Most of the stories about my life that I remember well are crystalized because I told someone a story about them soon after. This is a great practice for charting our devotional journeys… tell friends so they stay locked in your mind! This helps us a lot later on when we face that issue again.

The Value of Self-Forgiveness

To say it honestly, Christians have a history of using guilt to, “inspire” good behavior. The problem is that this “inspiration” also inspires resentment and bitterness and frustration. But time and again, Scripture speaks of the Christian life as, “freeing.” That is, when Christ enters your life you are meant to feel more free to live life the way God intended than any non-Christian ever can.

To me, this means that I need to be quicker to self-forgive. When I fail, yes, it is usually due to laziness and selfishness. But the way to correct it isn’t to wallow in self-hatred. The way to correct it is to get back on the horse. So forgive yourself when you fail and, making use of an accountability partner, get back at it!

Conclusion

So, here’s the short version of what I’d recommend.

Stage 1: Pray, asking God to give you wisdom in organizing your devotional time. Next, set a devotional goal for yourself, and set a specific time period for pursuing that goal. Write down some ideas for how you plan to pursue that goal. Finally, ask a friend to look over your plan, giving feedback on the basis of their knowledge of you, things to think about, new ideas that might be worth adding, etc. Finalize a basic (but always flexible!) structure for the time period.

Stage 2: Pursue it! And have fun. Consume Scripture, read recommended books, google articles, find people who disagree on the topic, write out an essay about how you answer a particular question, watch a movie that pertains to your topic… give your mind plenty of time to work through all the possibilities and to stretch in new ways.

Stage 3: Find ways to keep track. Tell stories about your experiences. Keep a record of the things you learn. Blog! Find a way to measure your progress.

Stage 4: Always be flexible. Allow yourself time off to focus on teaching a class or leading a bible study. Let yourself pursue a new idea you’d never considered, or respond to a time of strong sorrow or intense joy.

Stage 5: Forgive yourself. You’ll be imperfect, you’ll fail, and you’ll display the same weakness that every other human in all of time has displayed. Get over it and come up with a new idea.


Whatever you do, let intimacy with God be your constant pursuit, your constant joy, and a goal that never wavers even when we do. I’m hopeful that mindset will produce better results in your heart and in mine than we’ll ever get from rote practices and dry schedules.

Dealing with Routine, Faithful with What is Now

Something about routine has a numbing effect on me. The daily rhythms of preparing for work, commuting, clacking keyboards, schedules, watching movies and going to bed have a way of lulling me into a sort of tunnel vision, where I forget bits and pieces of who I meant to be.

Still, it is nice to sit down at the old keyboard, fighting to make the emotions skipping around in my psyche translate clearly into written words. It gives shape to things I experience, and an object with shape is much easier to hold and process and use meaningfully.

Samantha and I now live in a non-Seminary apartment complex called Village Manor. It is a place full of life- seminary students, people on welfare, refugees from foreign countries, international students… the list goes on. Here, we are trying to figure out the most constructive way to wait for what God would bring to us.

Samantha is wonderfully active. She spends time with friends, teaches English to two Nepali refugee girls, participates in small groups and a reading group, and of course takes care of Isaiah. It is a joy to watch her flourish as a person. I like it when people call me up out of the blue, only to find out that they want to talk with my wife and not me!

Speaking of joy, Isaiah is a thrill every day. He gets smarter and quicker all the time, which is sometimes wonderful and sometimes scary! I find that even his growing capacity for deceit and stubbornness is highly amusing. Isaiah likes to climb in my lap for about three seconds, and then he wants to climb onto other stuff. He likes to play with toys, but LOVES to play with adult stuff, especially cell phones. He enjoys pulling wires out of their sockets, and biting his stuffed animals on the nose.

My favorite thing is when I wake up in the morning and start to walk down the hall; he hears the floorboards creak and starts to yell at/for me. “Da! Da Da! DADADADADADA!” As far as I can tell, this means, “Get over here right now and get me out of this crib!” It is fun to comply, even when it means changing a soggy diaper that smells of ammonia.

My goal of late has been to become a pastor while I wait to become a pastor. People can be hard for me, and I do not think having official position will solve that struggle. So, I have been trying to use what free time I have to develop the skills to be a shepherd for those I love and whom God has given me a place of influence with. This might mean listening when a friend is frustrated, pursuing a wandering heart, counseling someone in a new situation, or leading a group of people toward new perspectives. I find that I am terribly uncertain of myself when doing these things, but it is always wonderful to see how clearly the Word speaks to all, allowing me to ignore my weakness and point to Certainty.

It has also been a time of growing confidence for me. I find that I can be effective at work, consistent in relationships, and even sorta fun sometimes. Mind you, my struggles with a bleak outlook on life certainly have not gone away. But still, it is comforting that God keeps bringing challenges designed to show his ability to bring you along safely.

So as I look forward to yet another stage of life not doing what I long to do, my hope is that Christ will continue to show himself strong in my weakness, that I will be prepared for whatever is next, and that I will be faithful with what is now.

People and Sadness

The other day my dad jokingly called me a, "road warrior." Between Christmas, New Years, new car, baby showers, and car problems, I've been on the road a lot. We were in Michigan this weekend, and I'm going back again next weekend.

When I travel, I wonder a lot about the people I see along the way. The friendly old lady at McDonalds, the sour-looking gas station attendant who perked up and smiled when she saw Isaiah, the strong-looking white haired old farmer who wanted a coffee refill; all these people have stories (most of them much longer than mine) and backgrounds and things they think about or are frustrated with. It makes me sad that I cannot talk to them, or help them with their frustrations and hurts, or even make their day all that much better.

I guess it highlights my preference for deep, thorough, complete ways of dealing with problems. I would much rather be a big help to one person than of passing help to ten, though it makes me sad that I cannot help the ten in a deep way too.

I think, when we come to these sorts of realizations about ourselves, it is very hard to make wise use of them. Is it a problem I should fix? Is it unhealthy for me? Does it hurt me in a good way? Would it be better for me to try to change my characteristics or find ways to accept them?

Though I do not know all the answers, I am deeply grateful that God designed the church to make use of every individual strengths and gift. And though it hurts me, I like the deep sadness that comes from seeing people who are hurting. It motivates me, deepens me, and hopefully causes me to better love those I can affect. When sadness moves us closer to Christ likeness, perhaps it is a sadness we need to be more comfortable with.

A Father's Gifts

Sometimes I don't identify with Scripture passages, but sometimes I do.

Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him! -Matthew 7:9-11

I want so badly to do the best thing for Isaiah. He brings incredible joy to my life, but he also makes me ask the question, "which is best?" about 10 times per day. Should I let him stay up later or put him to bed even though he's not tired? Is it ok to for him to chew on the table or do I need to start teaching him not to bite large items of furniture? How forceful should I be in holding him down while changing his diaper to communicate obedience?

God, in some sense, faces these decisions as our father every day. But unlike me (thank goodness) his actions toward us are perfect. He gives precisely what we need.

As Isaiah develops and matures, he'll want things from me. He may want a tennis racquet or ballet shoes (to which I'll say yes and no, respectively). He may prefer kung fu or video games depending on which way he leans culturally (hopefully toward his mother!). He will ask for the keys to the car or money for a date. He may ask to go on a mission trip to a dangerous city or country.

In all these things, my goal must be to give or withhold things on the basis of trying to best bless him toward a correct understanding of God, which is in his best interest. I must try to love him in a way that will bring glory to the Savior. One thing I hope Isaiah learns is that when he asks for things that are good for him, I will gladly give them. When he asks for things not in his best interest, I will withhold him. At least, that is my aim.

God, who gives perfectly, never fails in this quest. When we ask for things that God knows are in our best interest, he is pleased to give them. When we ask for things not in our best interest, he withholds them.

And when it is in our best interest to wait quietly, that is what he makes us do.

I'm not sure when, if ever, I will understand living quietly. But this I know; trusting the father pays, because he perfectly gives and withholds life's blessings. And so I pray and I wait.

To live quietly

Sometimes I read a passage of Scripture and don't identify with it, and can hardly believe it is true. Here is an example.

But we urge you, brothers, to do this (love the brethren) more and more, and to aspire to live quietly, and to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we instructed you, so that you may walk properly before outsiders and be dependent on no one.
1 Thessalonians 4:10-11

My wife knows how to live quietly. She can invest in home and family to the point where she has to check herself and reinvest in outside things. She doesn't bother people, doesn't make a fool of herself, and to my knowledge has few if any enemies.

I am quite the opposite. I toss my opinions around, argue hard for things that may or may not matter, and am impatient with a quiet life. I do like quietness, mind you; I love to read and spend hours thinking on my own. But on the whole, I prefer a list of challenges to the prospect of sameness any day of the week. When a problem arises, I want to solve it. When a group is presented with a challenge, I want to lead the charge. And when a people struggles with apathy, I want to call them back to faithfulness.

But now, life is quiet. Feedback I get from others suggests that though I have the gifts to be a pastor, I am not steady or mature enough to be one yet. I can barely take school classes because of my work schedule. I cannot invest in the church with the same amount of time that others can. I am not leading anything, not solving any problem, not learning anything (except electric market structures in the state of Illinois).

As a result, I am bored. I am embarrassed to have anyone look at my life. And I constantly wish I were elsewhere, despite knowing the problem of discontent is in the heart rather than the circumstance.

I wish I understood better what God wants to do in me. And I wish I could offer my wife more certainty of our place and direction. But I cannot. And so I pray and I wait.

A Song and a Blessing

I recently finished Deuteronomy. What a book! Moses recites God's Law to Israel, reminding them that success rides on obedience rather than strength of arms. He calls them to live obediently, rejecting the ways of the nations. He challenges them to love God only.

Deuteronomy ends with Moses delivering a song and a blessing. The song celebrates the way God fights for his people, delivering them from enemies. It ends thusly:

"Rejoice with him, O heavens;
bow down to him, all gods,
for he avenges the blood of his children
and takes vengeance on his adversaries.
He repays thsoe who hate him
and cleanses his people's land."

The blessing spreads hope for the ways God will bless individual tribes. It ends in a similar way;

"Happy are you, O Israel!
Who is like you,
a people saved by the Lord,
the shield of your help,
and the sword of your triumph!
Your enemies shall come,
fawning to you,
and you shall tread upon their backs."

These two pieces remind Israel of the most important thing, just before they enter the Promised Land: God fights the battles. He is the Sovereign One, success depends on Him alone, and their hopes for peace and prosperity rest on their relationship to him.

I love this thought, because it highlights truths that we can appreciate just as much today as the Israelites then. God fights our battles. We cannot look to worldly means for success, we can only live faithfully and trust God's direction for us. Our response to every challenge must be the same; faithfulness and obedience.

It is also beautiful and sad to remember throughout that Moses knows some key things:

1. He will not enter the Promised Land.
2. He will soon die.
3. Israel will fail to walk in obedience.

And yet he delivers this powerful oration with joy and strength, knowing that God will use his faithfulness rightly to bless the world with the knowledge of the Master of the Universe.

Deuteronomy is a powerful book for interacting with the character of God, and I've greatly enjoyed sitting under its teaching.

Next up; Micah.

The Joy for Those Who Obey

Deuteronomy 30 is the close of Moses' speech to the Israelites, which began in chapter 1. After the horrors of chapter 28 (see my last entry), it is full of welcome joy.

The LORD your God will make you abundantly prosperous in all the work of your hand, in the fruit of your womb and in the fruit of your cattle and in the fruit of your ground. For the LORD will again take delight in prospering you, as he took delight in your fathers...

It is an excellent closing arguement, because it emphasizes the certainty of God's character and the importance of choosing wisely.

I call heaven and earth to witness against you today, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and curse. Therefore choose life, that you and your offspring may live, loving the LORD your God, obeying his voice and holding fast to him, for he is your life and length of days, that you may dwell in the land that the LORD swore to your fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to give them.

What is interesting here is how Moses structures his speech as a call to action. "Do you desire blessing?" he seems to say. "Pursue it! Pursue it rightly, by repenting of sin and walking in obedience. Love God, love your neighbor. Enter joy by living in submission."

Recent days reminded me of the challenge presented by the world's self-centeredness. An atheist friend of mine recommended a book (called The Alchemist) which tries to beautify one young man's pursuit of his life purpose- conveniently ignoring the way he forsakes all duty, relational connections, and responsibility for the sake of finding what he wants. It is attractive because your mind tells you that the path will fulfill your longings.

After all, wouldn't it be nice to leave your spouse and family, leave your responsibilities, leave your problems? Do what you want, when you want? Never have to feel guilty?

It does sound nice. It is also a lie.

God calls us to something else entirely. He calls us to submission and sacrifice, to responsibility and suffering, to glorification of Him rather than of ourselves. And yet strangely, impossibly, and wonderfully- this path of suffering is the true path of joy and prosperity. What a God we serve.